A lot has changed since the accident. I can't even begin to express how grateful I am that God protected me - I know the reality of what could have been... I know the reality that everyone at the accident thought was true. There was no one at that accident that thought I was going to survive. There was more blood on the outside of my body that the inside by the time I made it to the hospital. Matt asked the paramedics where they were taking me and they told him a hospital in Scottsdale when he asked if they could take me to a hospital closer he was told no because it wasn't a hospital equipped to handle my type of trauma. I don't remember a lot about the accident I never saw the truck at all - I still don't have a clue what it looked like. I don't remember being hit and I was in and out of consciousness until I made it to my room in ICU. Matt made it to the scene of the accident and was able to see me before I was taken to the hospital - I'm not sure if that was a good thing because I'm sure it will take a long time for him to forget that image. Even when the cop came to our house a few days after I got out of the hospital he made a comment about how he didn't think I was going to make it from the looks of me at the accident. I was never scared that I was going to die I just kept asking God to let me be with my husband and kids just a little while longer. I thought about my family and friends and was just at peace. I am so grateful for the things that I do have - my loving husband, my 3 beautiful children, and all of my family and friends! I'm so thankful for my mom and dad who have been helping with the kids - my mom has taken care of the kids 100% and even takes care of me during the day!! She has been awesome! And since it takes 3 people to stabilize my neck to change out the pads on the brace my dad has even helped out!! :) My family is amazing and I am so blessed!! My friends who have prayed, called, sent cards, flowers, or just have come over to sit with me are amazing too - I love you all!
Here are some pictures of some things that have changed... 
Here is the Saturday before the accident - I got 6 inches cut off my hair - it was such a cute hair cut....
The day I came home from the hospital - NEVER again with I take for granted being able to pick up my kids anytime I want - or spending time with them. I don't get to hold them unless someone brings them to me and usually I can't hold them for very long. Every minute is precious.
My new lovely haircut... :)
The day I got my staples out - lookin' good!! My head feels so much better - it's still numb but the doctor said it might always be that way or I could get feeling back in a few months.
My kids used to be the ones that used the bibs... however I have trouble with my chin rest!! :) So I use this lovely bib to keep it clean!! My goal before I get this off is to be able to spit my toothpaste over the chin rest when brushing my teeth... it's hard but I have some time to perfect it!! :)
I went in for a check up today and next week I will have a spinal CT scan to check my fracture - We are praying that it's already starting to heal and calcifying!!! Right now I can not take my Miami J (cool name huh??) brace off except to change the pads and someone has to hold my neck completely still while someone else takes the brace off so needless to say it doesn't happen a whole lot. So it's only off a few minutes a week - hopefully after 4 weeks if everything is looking good I might be able to take it off a little more like to shower and stuff... but right now I'm not holding my breath for that. When the hospital was first talking Matt and I were both thought I was going to have to be in a halo... I am SOOOO very thankful that was not the case.
So that's a little bit of an update - please continue to keep Keegan in your prayers - he has not slept in his bed in his room since this accident. The morning of the accident he was not awake when I left with Hunter so he didn't see me that morning - the guy behind me at the accident managed to get Matt's phone number and my mom's phone number out of me and called both of them - my mom grabbed the kids out of bed and took them down to the scene which was right out in front of our subdivision- Keegan saw the car but never saw me but since I was in ICU for 3 days he didn't get to see me until I came home from the hospital and every morning since the accident he wakes up screaming! We think he just needs time - so we moved his bed into my mom's room and he sleeps between there and Matt's bed (Matt put another bed up in our room since I can't have movement in the bed). So hopefully he will start to feel better and be able to move back into his room. Other then that I cry a lot when I have to get into the car and make Matt call and check in with me every morning when he makes it to work... I'm sure over time it will be easier... but right now it's just very hard! Everyday we make it through and things get a little better and we thank God for everyday we are still together!
You have reminded me of how such tragedies can bring a new reality to us that cause us to count our blessings differently than we would in just any ordinary day. I think we live our lives to the fullest when we're not taking anything for granted. I suppose that's the silver lining in such circumstances as these.
ReplyDeleteI literally laughed out loud imagining you spitting your toothpaste. Oh wait, I'm still laughing. That's Youtube worthy for sure. :)
I'm so jealous of the friend you said came over to sit with you! My heart aches to do that! I miss you!